


Angel

by dimmedsunshine_and_heliophilia



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Graphic Imagery, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Kinda but not really, M/M, Not Beta Read, Soobin is soft, To Be Edited, but not towards soobin or yeonjun, except your never gonna know if its implied or its just me comparing, its not as dark as the tags, just dont read anything ur not comfortable with, looking back at it its just emo, possible angel AU, pussy used as an insult, this is kinda a twisted perception of the world and humans, yeonjun hates the world, yeonjun is kinda hard to make out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 19:34:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29051451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dimmedsunshine_and_heliophilia/pseuds/dimmedsunshine_and_heliophilia
Summary: He never thought he was a good person but he would like to think he's better than the others
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun
Kudos: 17





	Angel

**Author's Note:**

> iv had this in my drafts for ages I just didn't feel like editing but somehow I finally got to it.
> 
> and yes we going right into it

Humans were terrible cruel beings, every single one was so boisterous, disgusting, the lies, the envy, the sheer antagonism.

It disgusted him, how they faked themselves without a warning and how they lusted over others no regard for their well being. As if the other was a mere object of affection.   
They were ugly hypocrites that criticized others without hesitation, vain and hungry for attention. 

Humans were terrifying

And he truly did believe that out of everything he's ever seen they were the real monsters. The real terrors. They were the shadows that creeped out at night, the faces plagued with fake smiles and loose admiration. Flowing in narcissistic hypocrisy, it was all fucking disgusting and twisted at his guts made him want to rake his nails across his neck, they made him want to kneel over and spit blood until his throat was raw and torn up. 

He himself wasn't a good person most certainly not. He was a terrible person for the time he had told the girl her ex still liked her for comfort, only for her to come to him screaming the next day on how he had lied. He knew he had lied. He was well aware, so he took it he didn't feel empathy. The girl was just an unknown face; he barely knew her, she was no one to him.

Then there was that boy he had cruelly rejected **“I don’t like you and frankly, I don’t think I ever will ''** he recalls harshly spitting out, it tasteless and bland, the feeling of stale water settled on his tongue.

It was cruel, too cruel, so cruel it had the other boy balling before his feet.

but again somehow he felt nothing, not a bit of guilt not even an ounce of compunction.

He had left the other crying like that. Crying his eyes out face red and blotchy kneeling before where he had previously stood. 

face monotone as he heard the whispers float around him.

_“look at him how could he”_

_“he’s so full of himself, does he really think he’s that amazing? it’s laughable”_

he wanted to shut them up, he wanted to shut them all up to hush them, put an end to their baseless hypocrisy.

At least for this one time, he felt good as to what he had done.

He felt good, that boy had stalked him. Snapping photos when he thought he wasn't aware lusting over him in a disgusting fashion.

He hated him, he really did, he deserved it he fucking did and if he didn’t stop this time he wouldn’t hesitate to yell it at the cafeteria how the other had followed him home from school.

He hated them. 

Now that he thinks of it there was also that one time he had taunted a boy who had come asking for advice.

**“Do I look like your friend? Do I look like I'd help you of all people, someone as absolutely pathetic as you are? A pussy who can’t even fucking confess you're pathetic if you think id help you”** he could faintly recall saying.

but again he didn’t think he was completely in the wrong, yes he had left the other teary eyed and clenching his fists but again the other deserved it, he couldn’t help but think. Vividly remembered watching as the same boy pulled at a girl's hair. How he had kicked and yelled at her for being disgusting and pathetic and spitting at her cowering form afterward

 _“you're so pathetic and ugly how could anyone ever want you!”_ he had said no remorse left as he kicked at the body before walking away.

Disgusting once again utterly disgusting, Yeonjun felt nothing but utter disgust. 

He hated humans, how even the prettiest could be the ugliest and the kindest could be the most remorseless, how boundaries were ignored and lies flourished, falling from their mouths as if a rushing river, a gold mine.

He truly hated them perhaps it was the only feeling he felt these days. Hate, pure utter unbridled hate for humans and their cruel tendencies.

He hated humans

All except maybe one 

Choi Soobin, he recalled their name being. 

He was utterly perfect, unflawed seemingly the most compassionate being he had ever laid his otherwise regretful gaze upon.

The other was so kind to the point it was laughable. The way he helped others up when they only got up to laugh behind his back, the way he forgave everyone who had stabbed him in the back.   
Ignoring people feeding him compliments to which he responded to by smiled looking otherwise unaffected by how others chased after him eyes filled in want, envy they wanted him as a toy a prized possession they could show off _“look who I managed to score, I’m so fortunate to have him”_ the thoughts of showing him off, showcasing him, boasting about him plagued them as they chased for him, beckoned him as sickening as ever.

But he was so perfect, Yeonjun, as morbid as it was, didn’t blame them.   
It was just like humans to find something to cling onto something, to cleanse their wrongs and hide their darkness whether it be their social status, their beliefs, their fake smiles, or their place in the social hierarchy.

But Choi Soobin to him was utterly amazing, a marble ball polished and unblemished utterly beautiful so aesthetically pleasing it was impossible to look away and it wasn’t in terms of his physical attributes. Yeonjun doubted he would think of the other's looks so highly unless it was Choi Soobin, the perfect boy who had grabbed his attention.

He wanted to know him and wanted to ask him how are you so innocent, _how are you so entirely unproblematic, and so ridiculously selfless and loyal?_ He wanted to ask, _are you not as weak as any other human? How do you take it? Do you not fall apart sometimes?_

how does he keep smiling, it’s ridiculous how nonsensically mellow he is. Just taking everything as if it’s a casual conversation unaffected and seemingly unaware. 

  
Because as much as he hated humans, he was more comfortable surrounded by those riddled in impure intentions than someone unpredictable, ridiculously innocent, so incredibly untainted with no visible intentions nor motives he was dubious incalculable.

Yeonjun felt incomparably on guard around him, someone that perfect should not exist.   
He was waiting for Soobin to snap to go nuts to say something untactful and out of line to watch his eyes widen in realization, for him to slip up to do absolutely anything but to be like this. So fucking perfect, so much of a saint that it was unsettling, it ate away at Yeonjuns nerves, pulled at his heartstrings.

And somehow one day he found himself approaching the other, an attempt to settle his worries, to convince himself, That this Choi Soobin was just like the others. The only difference was that he hid it well, a perfect persona. 

Sitting next to him shocking the crowd surrounding the other, whispers and murmuring raiding the cafeteria. He turned to the other in his seat ignoring the others only for Soobin to smile, at him. No surprise or judgment in his eyes as he smiled a smile so wide, so softly elegant it could have blinded him.

“Hello, I don't believe we have talked face to face before” the other had said arm stretched out gesturing for a handshake “no I don't believe we have” Yeonjun had managed to get out wavering as he shook the other hand, how was he like this?how?why? 

The other only went proceeded talking about how he had seen him around in the hallways and it was a pleasure to meet him, ploy, a fucking ploy this had to be fake.  
The sincerity was ridiculous. He felt like gagging, How? Just how?  
“Why?” he unconsciously got out, the other seemingly unaware of his inner turmoil “why? Well you seem like an interesting person to me” what the fuck, an interesting person? he wanted to laugh and so he continued pushing his confusion to the side leaning forward intrigued. 

“oh, interesting? and how is that” 

“well-”

And slowly that day on, they had gotten closer. Oddly so, the school’s saint and he who the school considered a demonic being, a mobster of some sort.

he had visited the others house several times, Soobin’s room was painted the palest of blues, sheer linen curtains billowing over the open window always a subtle soft beat playing, the unfamiliar tune wafting through the air often accompanied by the distant whir of a fan or a lawnmower somewhere outside. 

And as they sat at the windowsill fingers brushing each other Soobin’s head resting comfortably on his shoulder and eyes closed not asleep but rather gently lulled in bliss. 

Contemplating Yeonjun really was curious of the other, but now he truly did find the other to be just as much of a saint as the others assigned him to be, how he managed to be so selfless and kind, joke without ever saying something even slightly upsetting or offensive. He was an angel and ironically so.

An angel unlike him ripped from his wings and thrown down from the sky. 

branded a disgrace, a coward, a Pathetic being unworthy of love nor innocence.

It was horrifying how he plummeted down in confusion, his broken wings ripped from their threshold, his back dripping in inky blood. Thick and heavy ringing the air in a metallic taste that just nearly made him pass out. 

It paved its way over the small of his back, wet and metallic rolling over his porcelain skin. He remembers hurling at the spot, not a minute too late, vomit scarlet and revolting, tainting his teeth as he heaved on the floor before feeling the sicking feeling rise up once again.

“Hey, are you okay?” Soobin’s soft voice spoke out worry, lacing his tone as he looked up to the other from his spot on the other's shoulder “yeah why” he breathed out. 

“Your eyes looked dark” “did they?” Yeonjun mused an eyebrow quirked up in silent amusement as to the other's finding.

“would you like to talk about it?” Soobin had continued snuggling up closer to the other, “it’s nothing, you don’t need to worry” he had silently replied turning his gaze to the distance.

“If you ever need to say something just tell me okay” Soobin repeated as his eyes shone in earnesty. He really was an angel Yeonjun thought as the other moved forward to gently hook his arms around his slightly smaller frame.

Soobin’s eyes were beautiful, they held no lust or greed; it was an epitome of starlight and shone as if it had somehow managed to catch hold of the entire galaxy. 

nonetheless, it bothered Yeonjun but he burrowed it deep inside imprinted it somewhere in the far corners of his brain forever lingering but not quite conscious no matter what he refused to feel anything, not for the humans he had wronged, not for those he felt nothing but pure disregard for and certainly not for the perfect boy who had their arms wrapped around him.

"would you like to hear a story?” 

“now? sure,” the other said, glancing up at him confused. 

“I used to know a boy, he was kind, unconditionally so. He was selfless and tried his best to please others. To the point, it might have been ridiculous' 'Yeonjun paused a small laugh bubbling up his throat as he saw Soobin's interested expression as he lay perched on his shoulder calming himself before he continued he went on “but he didn’t think so, so he continued on giving out compliments and love as if second nature. Everyone around him loved him, looked up to him until, one day, he slipped up showed a side of himself he shouldn’t have. something he could have kept hidden an interest, a feeling something he shouldn't have let out, and with that he was thrown out from the gates crying and stripped of both his respect and ability to love.” 

Soobin stayed silent for a bit “that sounds horrible” “it was” Yeonjun nonchalantly agreed. 

“was that for me?” Soobin asked causing Yeonjun to look at him alarmed, just now realizing how coincidently similar it sounded 

“No definitely not” he firmly stated “that boy was alone, Completely alone they loved him but they were not fond of him.  
love is simply a word they tossed around in situations such as these. But you, even if you snap I fully expect you to do so, if you slip up, I'll congratulate you for doing so, for finally doing something for yourself. You are not alone, you won’t face the same fate as he did, I won’t let you.” 

“Thank you” Soobin breathed out staring up at the other, 

“Could we stay like this for a bit?” he whispered, eyes still filled with emotion.

“I have all the time in the world” Yeonjun replied as Soobin adjusted himself, his head resting in the other lap, his hair spread out softly draping itself across the sides of his cheeks decorative and ethereal. A halo, Yeonjun couldn’t help but think.

Closing his eyes his thin eyelashes flutter shut his pale blue hair framing his face.

Leaving Yeonjun to sit there contemplating on whether it would be okay to run his hands through his hair.

**Author's Note:**

> any constructive criticism is appreciated <33


End file.
